Tuesday Snapshot- Edamame?

See that thrilling bowl of culinary geniusness? That was my dinner tonight. Yep. A large bowl of soy beans also known as Edamame. Nice. Well, not really. I ate my beans begrudgingly.

Want to know why? Because my house smells like a fart. Yep. It really does and it's not even slightly funny.

It all started with me thinking that because tonight is our second evening on our new healthy eating plan, that I should go to a little bit of trouble with dinner. So I decided to cook this here. Only I was roasting the whole chicken not the Maryland pieces and I substituted the potatoes for grilled capsicum. I was feeling particularly wholesome and stepfordy when I bought a fancy organic, corn fed chicken from the overpriced fancypants meat shop this afternoon.

I lost my cooking mojo when I became a mum. I used to really enjoy cooking but these days it is a chore so I even surprised myself when I was looking forward to making a nice dinner tonight. I was almost smug as I thought about my fabulous stepfordness. Until I got home.

I opened up the packet that the chicken came in and almost immediately I was overcome with a very very bad smell that would make Rotorua seem like a bottle of SJP's perfume. Tinker, my helpful assistant said "fluffy?" (this is what we call a fart) and I said no, no fluffies. "Melly poo?" No, no smelly poos either my darling. That is the smell of $30 wasted and the real death of my cooking mojo. So we wrapped the chicken into two of her nappy bags to contain the scent and we threw it out.

Not long after that my husband called to say he wouldn't be home for hours and had eaten dinner at work. So that is how I came to settle for a bowl of edamame. I was so exhausted after Tinker's bedtime tantrums and so cross about the chicken that I went for the beans. hmmf.

So that is the first of my Tuesday Snapshot posts. I will take a random photo every Tuesday and post it here to show you something remotely interesting about my day. I can't guarantee it will get any more interesting than a bowl of beans but I'll try my best.

Snapshot

I took this picture yesterday. That's my Tinker on the left and her BFF on the right with Nanny. The girls had the most wonderful time at the Playschool concert. They sat on the table together, hugged, kissed, danced and sung together. It was adorable.

This is such a sweet little age for the best friends, they have had playdates since birth and they have always enjoyed being friends but now they are older it is so sweet to see them loving each other. They do swimming together on Saturdays and poor Tinker has been a bit sad because her BFF has been sick for the past two weeks. It is so sweet they way she misses her and asks all weekend about her.

I have been reading a lot of blogs lately that mention the 365 day photo challenge where you take a photo each day for your blog. I'm not sure I can do it every day but it might be nice to post one each Tuesday. Is that boring? Let me know.

We are heading out early this morning so I'll take the camera and see what I can come up with for you. I see that so many bloggers are really talented photographers. I'm not one of them so you'll have to bear with me.

Have a great morning, I'll be back this afternoon.

What's new kitty cat?

Thought I should do another little catch up post for anyone who is remotely interested!

Just like your garden variety nutjob, I am asking myself some questions. You know what they say about talking to yourself...

1.What have you bought lately?

Not a great deal because we are on an economy drive at our house trying to save up for the big garden renovation which I will tell you all about soon. I did manage to grab a few bargains on Saturday at Kirribilli Markets. For the little Tinker I bought this sweet lilac cardigan, handknitted from alpaca wool. Isn't it gorgeous? It only cost me $36.50. I love a bargain.






2. What's on the menu?

Well the other day Stella McCartney tweeted about Meat Free Mondays and I think this is going to be something we will do in our house from now on. My husband and I are both fatter versions of our former selves and today we began our healthy new eating plan to lose some weight. I think Meat Free Mondays will assist in that. I promise to keep you updated (bored) about our new diet as it progresses... if it progresses! I'm not great at sticking to new regimes so don't hold your breath.

Tonight's dinner is this hearty vegetable and lentil soup that works out at $1.25AU per serve!





3. What are you reading?

No books at the moment, no time! Two of my friends are now bloggers so I am enjoying reading their posts. I thought I might share the links with you. It's funny because the nature of their blogs couldn't be more different. Both fabulous mummy bloggers, I think the subject matter will appeal to my lovely readers:

Apathetic Housewife

Super Organizer


4. What's new with Stepford Dreams?


Some of you have noticed I now have the http://www.stepforddreams.com/ site. Not sure if it makes any difference to anything but it sounds cool doesn't it?

Also I'm very excited about our Monday giveaways, so far they have been really fabulous and I'm pleased to say we have lots more scheduled.

If you have an interesting product you think other Stepford Dreams readers would love to hear about, please shoot me an email!

5. What's the Tinker been up to lately?


She is now 18 months old and every bit the tinker. She is incredibly cheeky and ever so beautiful. She really amazes me with her memory and her sense of humour.

I can't help but compare her to other children sometimes and I often feel so lucky to have such a bright and engaging girl. She has always been that way, never one to stare off blankly like a lump of child.

Even as a tiny baby she would really engage with people. Now that she is such a fabulous talker it is even more apparent how clever and complex she is.

Here she is looking up at the navy helicopters that fly over our us all the time. She was saying "Touch heycopter mama? Nooo! Too high ha ha. Touch? Nooo, silly!"





I have just enrolled her in Mandarin classes and I'm awfully excited about it. Learning languages is something I have always loved and I hope it is something my little Tinker enjoys.

The classes are held in a playgroup type format for parents and children and run for an hour and a half with painting, songs and stories. 90% of the session is in Mandarin and they are designed for children and parents who do not speak Mandarin at home. I'm so looking forward to it. We will do a trial session first to see if she likes it and of course I'll share our progress on the blog.


She had her 18 month vaccinations this morning and she was so brave because I bribed her with a jelly bean. It worked. I'm off to wake her up now because we are going to see the Playschool show live in concert with her BFF and her mummy. A fun play date. I will pack the camera!

See you later!

Monday Giveaway - Lovestamp... wear the love!

Alright, nobody likes Mondays but I think I have such a great giveaway today that it cancels out the Mondayitis.

The lovely Jo from Jo Girls Journey has come to the Stepford Dreams party with the most wonderful giveaway.

Her store Love Stamp is your one stop shop for beautifully hand-stamped bespoke jewellery. Like this amazing CHERISH necklace that Jo is giving one lucky Stepford Dreams reader:

A gorgeous little sterling silver 1/2“ pendant. This pendant is hand stamped with any name or word of your choice in either large capitals (one word) or two to four smaller words in my small font (see photos).

This lovely little pendant has antiqued letters for definition, and is domed which makes the dangle sit beautifully inside it.

This pendant comes with either one Swarovski crystal or Swarovski pearl, in the colour of your choice. The one above is this little girl’s birthstone. A beautiful gift for someone extra special in your life or just spoil your self.

This necklace comes to you strung on either a 16” or 18” sterling silver ball chain.
Total value $50.00

To be in the running for this beautiful prize, check out Jo's gorgeous store and let me know what your favourite thing is and why. See? No hoops to jump through, easy as pie!

Jo has two stores, one for the Aussie & NZ folk and another for the OS shoppers, so no matter where you are you can wear the love! Just gorgeous.

I really love being able to feature the work of other mums who manage to juggle everything and do it so beautifully. Jo is a WAHM of two wee ones, Ruby-Star 7 & Hudson 3.

Lovestamp was created out of a desire make simple, lovely pieces that can be worn casually with your jeans and t-shirt or out for a night on the town with your little black dress. Jo endeavors to make each piece meaningful and special to each and every customer.

Jo's custom hand stamped jewellery can be imprinted with your children’s names, a special word or saying, dates, whatever you dream of really. Lovestamp continues to grow day by day because mums, nanas and friends have shared Jo's designs with each other while picking up the kids from school gate, sharing a coffee or standing in line at the supermarket.

France Tells Women What Not to Wear

Move over Trinny and Susannah. French President Sarkozy now tells women what not to wear.

He has come out in opposition to the burkha. He said last week that "The burka is not a sign of religion. It is a sign of subservience. It will not be welcome on the territory of the French republic."

The burkha is the name of the cloak like garment worn mainly by Afghan women. It is the one with the mesh area over the eyes and you mostly see it in this shade of blue:

cache.daylife.com

I am not sure if president Sarkozy is talking about the burkha or whether he is just using that word to describe any face covering garment worn by Muslim women. The niqab as shown here is a lot more common than the burkha and can be seen on women here in Australia, often in black.

ares-online.com

The BBC actually has a series of pictures describing the different types of dress worn by Muslim women here:

I am not a fence-sitter on this issue.


I feel very strongly that all people should be free to wear what they like.



Be it skanky mini skirts & uggs, burkhas, or sheitels & tiechels.


I am not intimidated or offended by women who choose to cover their hair or their faces.



Jerusalemshots.com



In Australia we are very lucky. Our government does not tell us what to wear. I do feel a great sense of sadness for women who live in other parts of the world where they do not have the same right I have to choose my outfits.


Yes since having my Tinker and becoming a new body shape I have no idea how to dress to look good and I tend to choose some shocking ensembles, but I choose them. Nobody tells me what not to wear. Perhaps they should, I might look better!


On a serious note, I’m disappointed and saddened that the president of a supposedly forward thinking country would make such an archaic statement. How dare he tell women what they can and can’t wear.


Yes I know France has long been the centre of style and what I'm wearing right now is probably a bastardised cheap version of what some designer sent down the runway last season in Paris, but I think Sarkozy is wrong, wrong wrong.


The argument many have adopted against this type of dress is that it isn’t a choice for the women. That they are being told to dress like this. This attitude infuriates me. Just because you do not like the look of the niqab why do you assume other women have been brainwashed or forced into wearing it?


Is it because our culture is all about looks? Why can’t we look beyond our own values and imagine a completely different perspective on appearance? Is it so hard to get our heads around the idea that some women do not want to be seen when they are out and about? Is it so hard to imagine? You might not agree with it, but why can’t you just accept that some women choose this for themselves?


So many people say it is because they are brainwashed. Muslim women are damned if they come out and say it is not their families forcing them because people then say they must be brainwashed. I find that really offensive.


I really hate tattoos. I can’t imagine ever wanting to pay money to have pain inflicted on my body so that I can be stained with ink. I know plenty of women who do pay money for this, they love their tattoos. I find it an awful concept but I do not think they have been brainwashed. It isn't something I could ever choose for my body so shuld it be banned on that basis? No.


I just think women who choose to ink themselves have different ideas about what looks good and what suits them. They want to do different things with their body, and I am so happy that our free country allows women to make these choices.


There are Muslim women who want to get about covered head to toe with only their eyes showing. So what? Their bodies, their right to choose whether to show them or hide them. Yes it can be confronting to walk into a shop and see a lady looking a lot like a ninja but that’s life. We don’t all want to dress the same. Alannah Hill gets about made up like a geisha doll in a frou frou nightmare, that can be confronting as well but it is her body so please let her clothe it as she sees fit.


I guess to me, wanting to tattoo your body is as foreign a desire as wanting to wear a burkha. I love that my society lets me choose. I wouldn’t like to live somewhere that didn’t afford women that freedom.



What about nuns in full habit? Nobody ridicules their choice to cover everything but their hands and faces like images of the Virgin Mary. Would Sarkozy say that the habit is a sign of faith or a sign of subservience by a victim of brainwashing? No. Never. Hypocrisy stinks.

What are your thoughts on this issue?

Another Friday Winner!

So glad it is Friday, really looking forward to the weekend. My husband has been away a lot this week so it will be nice to have some quiet family time. Tinker has really missed him.

Now, what you have been waiting for... the winner of this week's fabulous giveaway courtesy of the lovely Meg at Pork Chop Kids...

Tinker and I put all the names into her little washing machine and she drew the winner:

La Tempete you are the winner! Please shoot me an email with your print and size preference and your address and I will pass it all on to Meg so she can send out your gorgeous little chops.

Thank you again Meg, we love Pork Chop Kids and I'm La Tempete will love her prize!

I hope everyone has a fabulous weekend and please be sure to check in again MOnday when I am announcing another gorgeous giveaway!!

Fast Friday Funny- An unusual Tool

Ok so if you are using your work computer you probably can't see this funny You Tube video recording of an advert. It is for a product called Kush. They have their own webstore here.

The Kush Support is a totally serious product, I thought it was a joke but after some investigating (aka googling) I can confirm that the Kush really is something that women (maybe some men) pay real (not monopoly) money to have in between their breasts.

The picture says it all. I took it from their site. They even have skin tone coloured ones for fair and dark skinned breasts. I guess the idea is for them to blend in. Not sure how any phallic shaped foam covered plastic object could blend in with a woman's bosom...

The Kush is designed to "offer comfort for:

Side Sleepers
C-Cup Breasts or Larger
Breast Implants
Post-Operative Recovery
Pregnancy
Nursing Mothers
Preventing Cleavage Wrinkles
Proper Spine Alignment "

Also on the Kush site Kathinka Chandler (lets not make jokes about her being a big "thinker" now will we?) CEO says that:

A few years ago, I began to notice the appearance of wrinkles in my cleavage area. No matter how much I used creams or exercised, the creases didn’t go away. So I began to research the cause and learned a lot.

Now, as a result of developing her absolutely amazing product our mate Kathinka the Thinker not only sleeps easy at night but she says I feel better about my appearance during the day. Kush is a dream come true.

So there you go ladies. Another fabulous product. It's fair to say this one won't be making it's way over to my weekly Monday Giveaway section anytime soon. So sorry to disappoint, at least I gave you a laugh though. Right? TGIF. Have a great weekend! Back shortly to draw our Pork Chop winner!

Don't miss this bus!!

Last day to enter my super cute Pork Chop Kids giveaway. All you need to do is click HERE and it is as easy as ever to win the tiny one in your life a really gorgeous little prize.

What's for Dinner Wednesday? Peas!

wickedsunshine.com



My mother and father-inlaw fly back home this afternoon so we will be having leftovers for dinner. We have an abundance of peas and my mother in law happened to leave me her Delicious Magazine (issue 84 July 2009) and they have a great section at the back for quick recipes for left overs.


They have a quick pea recipe on page 154 and I'm going to try it since we have all of these ingredients here already and after the traffic I'm bound to get on the way to the airport I don't think I'll feel like popping out to get more groceries.


Left-over Pea Pasta (I've named it, you can tell since it is so creative)

Cooked pasta of your choice


2 cups of peas


1 cup fresh ricotta cheese


1/2 cup fresh mint


Shaved Parmesan


Salt & Pepper


Crush 2 cups of blanched peas with a fork. Season, then mix with ricotta and chopped mint.


Stir through cooked pasta and drizzle with olive oil and add some shaved Parmesan.


Could it be any easier? Come on, could it?!

A Little Catch Up

Please forgive me for being brief, I have my lovely in-laws visiting so I don't want to be antisocial in front of my computer for their entire trip! We are having a ball and little Tinker is thrilled with the attention of FOUR grandparents every single day. Very lucky little bunny.

She has learnt so many new phrases while they have been here and she is really amazing us all with her gorgeous personality. She was such a little doll at playgroup today, she went and hugged a little girl who was crying and she continued to offer her toys to all the other children. Cue the gushing proud mama! Sorry I can't help it.

We will be back to regular programming on Thursday I promise.

***********

Now before I forget, my friend Kel over at Natsukashii tagged me with this little quiz so here are my answers:

Respond and rework; answer the questions on your blog, replace one question that you dislike with a question of your invention & add one more question of your own.

Tag eight other people:

Like Telle, I am leaving this bit open. Tag yourself if you have not already been tagged!

What is your current obsession?

Cancer. My best friend is fighting it and I’m looking for a fancypants doctor somewhere in the world who will fix her.

What’s for dinner?

Well we have just had dinner. Chicken & Parmesan schnitzel with salad. We had an apple and berry strudel with thick cream for dessert. Yes I am on a diet. I just forgot. Again.

What’s the last thing you bought?

Today I paid for my two Griffons Bruxellois to spend the day at the dog grooming place. They look like smooth Ewoks.

What are you listening to right now?

My mother and my inlaws are in the family room watching Grand Designs. I can hear that from here.

If you could go anywhere in the world for the next hour, where would you go?

Savannah might be nice this time of year?

Which language do you want to learn?

At one time I was studying 5 languages and fluent in 4. Now I’m struggling with English. I’d like to learn Mandarin.

What do you love most about where you currently live?

It has everything. Amazing views, lovely people, nice things to eat, nice walks and stunning harbourside parks. We are very lucky here, we chose well.

What is your favourite colour?

Navy blue

What is your favorite piece of clothing in your own wardrobe?

An LV brown silk cardigan with delicate little pearl buttons. It is exquisite and reminds me of more carefree times. It hangs on a brown velvet hanger and has been afforded pride of place with a good two inches either side so none of my ratty clothes dare to touch it.

Describe your personal style?

Do even have one anymore? Before my post-baby body when all my clothes fit me, I’d say it was along the lines of Charlotte from SATC but now it’s more like Miranda when she was going through that messy fat-bellied post-baby phase. It’s not hot.

If you had $300 now, what would you spend it on?

Shoes and a parking fine I got yesterday because the evil oncologist kept us waiting an hour. Cow.

What are you going to do after this?

Fold washing and call my husband to see if he made it home before curfew. Yes we have a curfew. Sydney airport won’t allow planes to land between 10pm and 6am.

What are your favourite films?

Not a film person. Weird isn’t it. I’d struggle to name one film I adore.

Your favourite smell?

Gardenia- my wedding flower.

Do you collect anything?

Regrets

What makes you follow a blog?

Quality writing usually.

Do you like to comment on blogs or just lurk?

I always try to comment because I hate that feeling where it seems I am talking to myself so I always say something.

What’s one thing you dream of doing?

So many things. I am a day dreamer. I’d love to have a few amazing holiday homes in exotic locations.

What is your biggest regret?

I have too many to list. I am a really regretful person. Is that even a word? I am very hard on myself and that’s how I like it so I regret a lot of things and which I'd done them differently. I remember my mistakes.

What is your favourite thing to do on a rainy day?

Leave on a plane bound for sunny skies. Don’t you love taking off when it is raining? Makes it all the more exciting.

Do you have a tattoo?

Absolutely not. I really hate tattoos, boganic. No exceptions sorry.

If you could be anyone who would it be?

Queen Rania of Jordan. I totally have a girl crush on her. I'd love to be her. She is brilliant. Wise, beautiful, a fantastic mother, wife. Queen Rania does such amazing things for the women and children of Jordan. She also gets to wear a crown. She is awesome.

Are you left handed, right handed, ambidextrous, or a little of both?

Right. Isn’t ambidextrous a little of both so I don’t think I get the question.

What is the single most defining moment of your life thus far?

Becoming a mum I’d say.

So what do you DO?

Along with the outrageous hours he works and the family un-friendly travel he has, my husband also has to drag me along to a number of a functions. It is basically the same night out, different dress, slightly different menu, same conversation, same people time after time after time.

I smile, I nod I say things like "oh so wonderful to see you again" "How is little Max liking Cranbrook?" "I heard you sold the Palm Beach house, how fabulous!" and occasionally I accept a glass of champagne instead of orange juice and occasionally I forget my corporate-wife hat and accidentally say something negative. I'm not chipper and I'm not cheesy so while I can hold a fake smile for an impressive length of time I'm not so good with the fake chipper talk.

Last year when the GFC hysteria had really taken hold we were at a rather glittery corporate function. Tinker had been tricky that day and I'd forgotten to have lunch so by the time I arrived I was starving. Of course canapes were tiny and champagne was flowing. After maybe two glasses of champagne Mr Elderly I'm Worth About A Gazillion Dollars strolls up to our little group. He launches into this impromptu pep talk about putting clients first in this state of flux and no matter what happens you need to get yourselves out there and make sacrifices for the firm.

For a split second I was back at work. I was the young female solicitor in the room full of old male barristers and I'd forgotten my corporate -wife hat again. I was back to being the loud opinionated one and before I knew it I had interrupted Mr Moneybags with "well that's all fine and good if you haven't been fired isn't it?"

My husband gulped, the other wives froze and Mr Money blinked twice, clenched his jaw slightly and being the polished banker that he is, continued his speech as though I wasn't there and I hadn't spoken. Once he'd finished talking the others dissipated so it was just me, my empty glass and my husband standing there. "Oh was that bad darling? I just thought in light of half the team being sacked right before Christmas and with many of us unable to keep our houses I might just say something..." I can't remember what his reply was, but I was on my best behaviour after that.

For the rest of the night I did a fair bit of smiling and nodding and for a change whenever anyone asked me "so what do you do?" I just gave them the answer that would stop further conversation. I'd answer: "Oh I'm at home, we have a little baby girl". Normally I'm quick to follow up with "but I was a lawyer..."

Why? Why am I so quick to defend a role I was always so looking forward to having? A role I actually really really love? A role I genuinely prefer to my "proper" professional job... It is strange isn't it? What do you say when people ask you what you do? Are you proud, embarrassed or a bit of both?

The type of job my husband has makes it hard for both of us to work. If we did, unless I had the type of job where my hours were fixed, then I'm not sure we'd ever actually see each other. We would probably end up being weekend parents and while it works beautifully for a lot of families, it just isn't the answer for our little family. I have always wanted to be a full time mum and wife and despite what people assume, I did love my professional job as well. I just love this more. Really. Most people raise their eyebrows when I say that. They assume my job was awful or maybe I'm not truthful. I have absolutely no reason to lie at all. I loved it, but I love this more. I really really do. I don't even miss my job. I think of it fondly but I have never wanted to swap back.

Often people remark that I wasted my education, all that time and money on law school and all the training I had to do on the job. I don't agree. My studies, my work experience and my outlook make me the person I am today. The wife I am and the mother that I am. So to those people, I say thanks but no thanks. I've wasted nothing and gained more than I could have ever imagined. Is it so hard to believe? Very few people seem to accept my take on this. What are your thoughts?

Monday Giveaway - Pork Chop Kids!

Ever so pleased to be starting the week with another giveaway!

This week our gorgeous prize comes from the lovely Meg at

Pork Chop Kids.

You might remember when I ordered the Tinker 6 pairs of these after stumbling upon Meg's fabulous store back in May? Well they were a hit in this house. The little Tinker loves them and I can't wash them quick enough because she goes through two pairs a day.

Always changing her mind and her outfits. She loves her little pork chops. They are perfect for my ultra-active girl. She bounces around the house day and night, regular socks are always falling off and getting lost. Not the chops!

They are the cutest, cleverest little things. I was so thrilled with them that I absolutely had to do a giveaway for the blog, so here we are today.




Meg says Pork Chops were born from the evolution of necessity…warmth, protection, easy diaper changes, no missing socks, non-skid and runway-ready fashion!

Meg is offering our lucky winner a pair of Pork Chops in the print and size of their choice! To enter all you need to do is check out Meg's store here and leave me a comment below telling me which print you like best and why.

You know the drill, Tinker will pick the winner on Friday morning. As always she is open to bribes. She likes grapes, cheese, chocolate and teddy bear biscuits.

You say Pajama I say Pyjama

We have another winner!

I'm so pleased with the great response we had to this week's giveaway. If you missed out, don't worry because we have another great giveaway on Monday. I'm going to try and start each week with a wonderful giveaway.

The lovely Vanessa from Gingerlilly Sleepwear kindly donated a pair of her gorgeous baby PJs and the lucky winner, as chosen by The Tinker is...

Number 10... it's you Amanda Jane! Your little cherub is going to love her new jammies. Please shoot me an email with your favourite baby PJ style and size and your address so we can send your prize out to you.

Thanks again Vanessa, we love your store!

'Tis the end of the week so I bid you all farewell. I hope everyone has a wonderful weekend.

The little Tinker is going to be spoilt rotten. My inlaws arrived yesterday and they are here for a week. They came bearing a fabulous little tea set for Tinker. You can see it came in that adorable little suitcase used to pick today's winner. She adores it. As soon as her Gra presented her with the present she has been making us all cups of tea non-stop. First thing she said this morning after telling me she wanted noodles for breakfast was that it was time for tea!

Here is a little pic of Tinker and her Gra taken yesterday with the new tea-set.

Fast Friday Funny - Train talk

One thing I do not miss about working in the CBD is having to take public transport every day. While nobody wants to be sardine packed into the back of an overweight sweaty McDonalds Coffee drinking loser from the photocopy room for 20 minutes, there are some good things about Sydney's trains.

Alright I exaggerated. There is only one thing. Listening to other people's really silly conversations. I love a good eavesdrop, In fact I was disappointed we bought the swankiest baby monitor on the block because I was secretly looking forward to picking up on my neighbours phone calls via the cheap monitor feedback.

For anyone who follows me Twitter you'd know I had an interesting start to my day on Wednesday when I had to go the ER at the Sydney Eye Hospital. That place is medieval, half an hour there would make for an entire blog of horror stories but this is meant to be a Fast Friday Funny so I won't go there now. Anyway I caught the train there. Again, let's not go there. A train ride to the ER? No taxis and I couldn't drive because of my eye situation.

Anyhoo the point of the worlds most longwinded blog intro is that MX magazine publishes a column of commuters' funny eavesdropping tales and here are a few I thought might give you a giggle this morning.

Girl: "I'm going to get a nose job"

Boy: "Why?"

Girl: "So my children won't get a big nose"
Boy: "Isn't it in your genes??

_

Girl on phone: "She's like, such a loser. I can't believe she forgot your birthday. OK, so it wasn't actually your birthday that day, but still."

_

Guy to friend: Don't listen to him, he;s a telepathical liar."

_

Girl reading MX: "Why is he on the front page?"

Friend: "because he is famous"

Girl: "Who is he?"

Friend: "Dunno."

Have a very happy Friday, will be back shortly to draw the winner of our giveaway. You have an hour left to enter before Tinker gets up. Click here to enter!

Baby Ejected from Senate

Ok so this news article has left me rather confused and I'm wondering if someone can explain it to me?

Not sure if I am missing the point, perhaps a Canberra reader gets it and will explain it to me!

Is it the case that Senator Hanson-Young had her 2 year old child with her in the senate chamber today when they just happened to be voting on a ban on junk food advertising on children's television, when she was removed from the chamber?

Is that what happened?

I don't get it. Does this senator take her baby to work every day or just when they are discussing issues affecting children?

Or is it just a coincidence?

I must confess I rarely keep up with political news. It's hard enough keeping up with which sandal brand Gwyneth chooses for Apple let alone what the pollies are up to in Canberra but this one caught my eye. What are your thoughts?

Was it a stunt?

Should parents be allowed to take their children into the senate chamber while it is in session?

Should we all be allowed to bring our kids into the office?

I suppose it would be like me bringing Tinker along to Saturday morning bail court. Comments?

Just shut up and smile

poligazette.org

Beauty pageant entrants can't win. The poor dears. If they are not hounded for saying stupid things like this twit here they are hounded for actually having an opinion like this rightwinger.



While I might not share this girl's opinion, surely she shouldn't be hounded for having one? Or should she?



Perhaps they should totally remove the question-answer bit from beauty pageants all together. These pretty girls are meant to shut up and smile so the judges can pick which smiling dolly is the prettiest so why bother getting them to speak at all? Why pretend it is something it isn't?





What do you think?

Your Daily Dose of Hot Studs

image credit warrelics

Ah-hah! I tricked you. You didn't think I was going to have pictures of handsome young fellows here did you?

Now for the non-parents, this post will bore you to tears. How do I know this? Because there is no way in hell I'd ever write a post about press studs before I had my daughter.

In fact I don't think I really even knew they existed til I was pregnant and started buying onesies.

For the non-parents who are still reading, a onesie is a top that buttons at the crotch generally with press studs. Why is this even worth discussing? Gosh I guess it is because I have no life and I'm randomly clutching at straws to entertain you. No, actually this post is not designed to entertain. This is a public service announcement. Cue the stern government ad voice.


Babies can be very messy individuals, they spew, they dribble, they have accidents, they spill food on themselves, they draw on themselves. You are forever changing their clothes and washing and drying so you really must choose clothess that can withstand a lot of washing.


I am fastidious about stains. A pet hate of mine is seeing babies and children with food stains on their clothes. If I spill something on myself I take it off and change it so I like to apply the same standards to my little bunny. I hate the sight of a child with dried food all down her outfit. Yuck.



So I do a lot of laundry. At least 3 loads per day. I think I am qualified to call myself an expert when it comes to judging the hardiness of baby clothes.
I love onesies because they do not ride up and expose little baby backs and little baby bellies. They keep them all nice and snug and they are easy to deal with at nappy change time. I have tried the following brands of onesie and I the majority failed what we will call the "tinker test" mainly on account of the studs falling off or the seams not being strong enough.


I'm a tough critic and if you are the owner of one of these brands please accept my sincere apologies but I'm in the business of helping out my fellow onesie buyers so I have to be truthful!


Little Tinker sleep-testing an Absorba onesie.


These onesies failed the Tinker Test:

Target
Pumpkin Patch
Sooki
Rock Your Baby
Bonds
Coosh Baby
Le Petit Bateau



These onesies passed the Tinker Test:

Gymboree
Janie & Jack
Crazy 8
Country Road
Absorba
Seed
Mill & Mia


There are other brands we have tried but I've only included brands that we had more than one item for, because you can't rate a onesie brand on a single onesie!

The biggest gold star goes to Gymboree. My Tinker was tiny for a long time and on her first birthday she was still wearing the 3-6 month size onesies she had been in for months and months. So those that lasted all that time endured some serious washing and drying. None of her Gymbo onesies have ever started to show any pull at the studs and all the seams are in tact. The snap placement is great and they seem to reinforce them with a band of fabric.


So there you go an entire post about 2 tiny bits of metal that come together to keep a crotch cosy. Weird. I hope it was helpful to someone! I spent so much money on Tinker's clothes and it always annoyed me when things just didn't last. It's kind of sad how much time I have spent thinking about press studs isn't it...

What's for Dinner Wednesday? Omelete & Warm Tomato Salad

Rolled Omelet with Warm Tomato Salad

Ok so this is what's on our menu tonight. It is as easy as can be and it is also pretty healthy. I have my inlaws arriving tomorrow for a week and they like really yummy fancypants things so I figured we'd have a very simple thing tonight before a week of decadence!

The omelet recipe is from my favourite ex con Martha Stewart and the warm tomato recipe is one I've been using for ages you can find it at taste.com.au.

For my friends in the Northern Hemisphere, you could make a basic tomato salad instead of going for the warmer variety. For us southern folk it is a rather chilly winter so we need the warm tomato salad. You could also have a warm tomato soup instead.

Ok so lets start with the omelet and our mates over at Martha's website have kindly provided an idiots guide to making a rolled omelet so I have copied their pics below.


Ingredients
Serves 4
Olive oil, for pan
1 cup milk
1/3 cup all-purpose (plain) flour (spooned and leveled)
8 large eggs
1 tablespoon Dijon mustard
Coarse salt and ground pepper
2 packages frozen chopped spinach, thawed and squeezed dry
1 1/2 cups shredded cheddar (6 ounces)


Directions

Preheat oven to 350 degrees for the Fahrenheit folks (for us in metric land it is 180). Brush a 10-by-15-inch rimmed baking sheet or jelly-roll pan with oil. Line bottom of pan with parchment, leaving a 1-inch overhang on the two shorter sides. Brush parchment with oil.



In a bowl, whisk together milk and flour. Add eggs, mustard, 1 teaspoon salt, and teaspoon pepper; whisk to combine. Pour into pan. Sprinkle spinach over top in an even layer.






Bake until edges of omelet are set, 10 to 12 minutes. Sprinkle with cheddar; bake until cheese has melted, 2 to 4 minutes. Beginning at one shorter end, lift parchment, and roll up omelet tightly, peeling back parchment as you go. Slice and serve.



Now for the warm tomato salad

Ingredients
tablespoon olive oil
2 garlic cloves, crushed
200g (7 ounces) yellow grape tomatoes, halved
250g (8 ounces)red cherry tomatoes, halved
2 (300g) vine-ripened tomatoes, sliced
2 tablespoons white balsamic vinegar
1/2 cup fresh basil leaves

Method

Place oil, garlic and tomatoes in a large, non-stick frying pan over low heat. Cook, stirring occasionally, for 3 to 5 minutes or until tomatoes are warm but still firm. Remove from heat.
Stir in vinegar. Spoon onto a plate. Sprinkle with basil. Season with salt and pepper. Serve.

Ok so there were none of these yellow grape ones at my local Woolworths yesterday. I don't think it is the season for them now so I just bought a zucchini and I'll dice that instead!

Ta-daaa Here Is Your Prize!

Or not.

I don't know if it is just me, but does anyone else find some competitions really tedious?

Often I read about a prize or a giveaway in a magazine and think I might like to win that but when I read the hoops I have to jump through I think nah bugger that I can't be bothered.

Or I think gee that isn't even such a good prize, in fact you should be paying me to take it off your hands not asking me to click here, read that, go back, follow this write this and all under 25 words while standing on my head and sending in 3 barcodes.

Like the other day I was buying some pasta and I saw the sign that said free sauce with every packet of pasta. You had to buy the pasta and sauce and then claim the money back later. Ok so I bought two stupid packets of pasta and 2 sauces only to find they not only want the barcodes and the receipts but I have to register online AND send in the paperwork. For a jar of sauce?!

Or those bloggers who say you have to be a follower of my blog, write a post about my giveaway, check out this website, click here, tell me in 25 words or less why you like it and then I will put your name into a hat and if you win I'll give you this crappy t-shirt that I spent 2 minutes embroidering. Oh and you have to be a U.S resident as well. What's with that? Are your tshirts that good?

I like prizes that are fun and easy to get so take this as a promise from me now that I'll never run an annoying giveaway on this blog. Now I want you to copy and paste this and send it to 1000 people, tell me in 25 words or less how clever and funny I am AND name your first child after me. OK?

Cutting out my eye to spite my face

image credit squidoo.com

So if you came here looking for a chipper upbeat cuddly little post from a meek and mild little blogger in a pretty apron I suggest you back away now because Mrs Crankpants is here at the keyboard. Ok so I may own a pretty apron or 4 but I'm not Mrs Cleaver today. I'm Mrs Cranky.

Now I realise it might be overkill to post another little rant about the medical profession after yesterday's tale of Dr Google but I can't help myself. I do not swan about lunching glamorously or shopping up a storm. I'm one of the ordinary mums who does ordinary things like housework and takes thrilling trips to Aldi for cheap biscuits and secretly fantasises about voodoo.

Voodoo. Yes that weird practice where you get an ugly mini me of your enemy and you poke it with pins. I am actually thinking about going into business selling voodoo dolls of medical receptionists. I reckon I'd make a fortune.

Now before you all get cross with me let me preface this by saying that I have worked as a receptionist. At a store, a law firm and an investment bank so this isn't a receptionist rant in general. No this little gem of a rant is directed at those who make a living by answering a doctor's phone while rolling their eyes, asking stupid questions and making outrageous statements to ophthalmic patients like well maybe you can't see out of that eye because you have the patch there from the surgery.

Right. I'm ringing my surgeon because I can't see and it hasn't occurred to me that I should take the patch off my eye first. Maybe you might actually understand what I'm saying if you take that garish fake fingernail out of your ear and actually listen to what I'm saying you useless phone answering bag of stupidness. Yes, a medical receptionist actually said that to me once.

I had a similarly frustrating conversation today only I had it 5 times with two different fools at the same office and the outcome is that I now need to find a new eye surgeon because I've fired mine. Sure I've got a suture poking out of my eye scratching the jeepers out of my eyelid and the only other surgeon who actually treats the wonky eye problem that I have is IN ANOTHER STATE but bugger that for a lark I refuse to keep paying this asshat to fob my calls off to a bunch of women with the collective intelligence of a gnat's pinkie toe.

Don't get me wrong I am sure there are a few lovely medical receptionists somewhere in the world but in my experience (and let me tell you I've had so many medical appointments in my life) the medical receptionist falls into one of these categories:

1. The I Am In Love With The Doctor So Badly That I Can't Sleep At Night Variety. This is the receptionist who refers to the doctor as "doctor" as though it is his or her name, the way you would refer to me as Carolyn. So she'll say "oh no I'm afraid Doctor can't take calls right now. I made him a little sandwich because he seemed awfully tired and needed a little break poor pet." It drives me mad. Either put a pronoun in front of it or add his surname. You could very easily substitute it for God. "Oh no God can't possibly take your call right now, he is way too busy." Only to these women, "Doctor" is bigger and better than God.

2. The I Hate My Job, I Hate Doctors And I Hate You More Variety. This is the one whose eyebrows are permanently raised and eyes seem to be stuck on automatic roll. Everything you say or do is annoying to this person and no matter how polite and thoughtful you are, she will not assist you in any way. Child is going blue after chocking on something? Old lady fell in the car park and broke her hip? Too bad. This lady is not going to the page your doctor, it is all too tedious for her. You'll have to wait til her shift changes.

3. The Acrylic Nail Size Zero Too Much Hairspray Plunging Neckline Variety. This is the one who is not listening to what you are saying and never will. She is A.) too stupid and B.)too busy adjusting her tight polyester booby top while checking out her reflection in the caller ID screen on the phone. She is about as clever as your shoe, she doesn't understand medical terminology but she will never let you speak to the doctor, ever and you will never get a coherent message to or from the doctor when she is on duty.

4. The Receptionist Who Knows As Much If Not More Than The Doctor Variety. This is the one who diagnoses your condition over the phone and decides whether or not you deserve an appointment with the doctor. You have more chance of variety #3 putting you through to the doctor than this one. This one is smarter than the doctor so any advice she gives you must be accepted and if you even dare again to ask to speak with your doctor she will refuse and not only that she will black mark your file with a symbol only she and the doctor understand.

5. The Variety Who Isn't Any Of The Above. Sorry but so far I haven't met this one.

So have I mentioned how much my eye hurts?

Let me tell you a joke.

Alli & Me aged 15 in Noumea, roomates at the dorkiest hotel in New Caledonia.

So on Friday the oncologist rings my best friend.

The Dr says: We got the latest PET scan results and I'm not really sure what we can do for you so I'm going to ring another doctor. He is older than me so he might have some ideas. Before our next meeting, see if you can find anything on google as well.

verbatim. No I am not joking.

So we had a little laugh.

What else does one do when their oncologist recommends Dr Google? Or pulls the 'phone a friend' card because HE IS OLDER?!

Times like these... you laugh or you cry and we choose to laugh. Hysterically. It's what we've done since we were 14 see photo above and it is what we will keep on doing through this hilariously funny episode known as Alli's cancer shmancer.

So far through all her surgeries and chemo days and crazy days catching wee in a cup and dodging spew on my collar I have been able to put a funny spin on things and my best friend and I have continued to giggle.

On the odd chance that I run out of material Alli has found us a very funny excursion in a few weeks time. It is sure to give us and you (because how could I not share with my blog?) a very big chuckle.

We are going to a Laughter Yoga session. Yes, a laughter yoga session. What's so funny about yoga? Well aside from the fact I hate yoga with a passion (except in the context of my high maintenance preschool list) and the fact that I'm actually doing it is pretty funny, this is not a normal yoga session. This is a wacky kind of yoga designed to make you laugh. You can read all about it here.

I'm imagining ladies with hairy armpits and orange headbands and men in pastel lycra. We are expecting the participants to be funnier than the activity itself and if our predictions are right then I'll be back here with some funny takes for you as well.

When was the last time you had a really big proper belly laugh?

Monday Giveaway - Gingerlilly PJs

I am so pleased to start the week with another wonderful giveaway!

This week's prize is from another fabulous store run by an Aussie! Vanessa Sofia is the founder of Gingerlilly sleepwear and I happily stumbled upon her company when I bought some gorgeous PJs for my little Tinker. In fact she was wearing them when she picked the winner for our first giveaway here.

The funny thing about these pjs is I bought them for the box, I thought it would fabulous on the bookshelf in her nursery and the PJs were an added bonus. Well they turned out to be Tinker's favourite PJs and the box looks a treat. See:

To enter this giveaway all you need to do is checkout Gingerlilly's online store here and have a look through their men's women's and baby's sections and let me know what you love.

Your prize is your choice of a pair of baby PJs like the ones the Tinker has.

They are made of the loveliest thickest cotton. Super soft on sweet baby skin. The sizes run large and my almost 18 month old still has plenty of the room in the 6-12 month size. Tinker has a few pairs, they are all gorgeous and you have 2 pages of colour/pattern options so you will definitely find the perfect pair. They come in the cutest boxes made from the same fabric and applique as the PJs. Perfect little keepsake boxes and ideal as gifts.

Thanks again Vanessa for this very generous prize. As usual Tinker will draw the winner on Friday, don't be shy please enter!

Another Winner!

First thing this morning little Tinker and I had a chat with "Rocket" her frog puppet (I guess she named him after Rocket in the Fimbles. She is so clever my kid!)

We decided to put all the numbers into the puppet and Tinker chose the winner!

The third entrant is... Auntie Em! You won! You won! Please shoot me an email with your details so I can pass them onto Viv. You are going to love this prize. Thanks again to everyone who entered and a big thanks to you Viv for this great prize.

Please make sure you all check back on Monday morning because I have another fabulous giveaway. This time it is something really special for the littlest one in your life!

Have a great weekend.

Fast Friday Funny- Kevin oh Kevin

I had typed out quite an essay of an intro for this week's funny Friday footage but then I deleted it because, lets face it. This video speaks for itself.

I am mindful of the fact that many of the people who read my little blog are from other parts of the globe, so to help you out I'll just direct you to please look at the gentleman in the video to the left of your screen behind the man speaking. This fellow is Kevin Rudd, he is our Prime Minister. Please just watch what he does. Oh and the lady seated in front of him is Julia Gillard. She is Deputy Prime Minister. Her hair is no longer hot pink.

Here is the video. You do not need sound for this one. I just don't know what to say, I have no commentary. It is just too ikky. I know this is old news but it is funny news.

Tag! You're it!

Telle from Fat Mum Slim tagged me here with this fun photo post.

It's really simple. I love how every photo tells a story. Some short stories, some long tales. I want to know what is your favourite photo of yourself. Everyone has one. The photo they look at and smile. It reminds them of something, some time, some place. A moment in time.So share the photo, share the story and then tag three other people. I want to see photos and stories all around the blogosphere.

So I had a really good think and my very favourite photos of myself are ones with other people in them, the most wonderful one is the one my husband took with his Blackberry the moment my daughter was handed to me. Since I don't want her face on the web I have this instead.

Like Telle, I chose a picture of me from our honeymoon.

This was taken just after the sun had set. We were having cocktails by the beach and everything was fairy-tale perfect. This photo was taken here. It really was heaven on earth.

When we came home, we found out that I fell pregnant on our honeymoon, so while I don't want my daughter's face on my blog you might see a certain sparkle in my eyes here and I like to think it is the little Tinker.

Now I have to tag 3 more people. All they need to do is copy and paste the writing that is in bold as well as the polaroid above onto their blog, and then select three other people/blogs to tag.

Gee You're Brave
All Things Lovely
Life As A Goff

I have chosen 3 gorgeous Aussie girls for this one!